New Year Resolutions You Can Keep

1. Spend more time watching TV/movies.
2. Chat more over the internet.
3. Read less.
4. Put on at least 30 pounds.
5. Stop exercising. Waste of time.
6. Procrastinate more.
7. Drink. Drink some more.
8. Start being superstitious.
9. Spend more time at work. Get less done.
10. Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.
11. Take up a new habit: Maybe smoking!